“A hamburger walked into a bar and the bartender said, ‘I’m sorry, we don’t serve food here.’” Food walking into a bar is also a popular topic, even if they usually fall firmly into lame, “dad joke” territory: It is, nonetheless, the very earliest example of the animal-walks-into-a-bar joke.”Īn animal walking into a bar is, of course, just a simple variation of a guy walking into a bar, and it’s a good illustration of how the format can be restructured for more possibilities. I’ll open this one.’’ Why that’s funny has been lost in a mist of 4,000 years. For example, ‘A dog walked into a tavern and said, ‘I can’t see a thing. sometimes, lines have survived that are clearly jokes, but which we can no longer get. They made lists of them, and some are still recognizably funny, or sort of funny, today. As author Mark Forsyth writes in A Short History of Drunkenness, “Sumerians liked jokes. In the midst of my digging, I also found out that this kind of joke is far older than I ever could have thought - it dates back at least to the ancient Sumerians, some 4,000 years ago. Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?’” Infuriated, the man storms to the bartender and screams, ‘I think your genie is hard of hearing, I asked for a million bucks, but instead I got a million ducks!’ The bartender shakes his head and replies, ‘Of course he’s hard of hearing. Without hesitation the man wishes for a million bucks, but instead, one million ducks instantly appear. The man dashes into the closet and, as the bartender said, there is a genie inside. Stunned, the man asked the bartender where he got this amazing person, and the bartender says that inside the closet, there’s a genie that will grant him a single wish. “A man walks into a bar and, to his amazement, he finds a tiny person playing a tiny piano. And so, after watching the documentary, I decided to go looking online for more of them and I found this gem: I’ve found “knock-knock” jokes annoying since I was about eight years old, but a well-crafted “guy walks into a bar” joke continues to get me going, even if the joke is several decades old. It’s amazing to me that jokes in this format can still make me laugh. The dog shakes it off, looks to his owner and says, ‘You think I should have said DiMaggio?’” If your dog doesn’t talk, I throw you two through a window.’ Guy says, ‘You’re on,’ and turns to his dog: ‘Fido, what do you call the top of a building?’ Dog goes, ‘Roof!’ Guy says, ‘Fido, what do you call the top of your mouth?’ Dog goes, ‘Roof!’ Guy says, ‘Fido, who’s the greatest baseball player of all time?’ Dog says, ‘Roof!’ Bartender then picks the two of them up and throws them through a window. Bartender says, ‘Get that dog out of here!’ and the guy says, ‘No, my dog can talk.’ Bartender says, ‘If your dog talks, I’ll give you $500. The funniest was a good, old fashioned “guy walks into a bar” joke: The Super Bob Einstein Movie was a touching tribute, and perhaps the best part was that it was intercut with Einstein telling some of his favorite jokes, much like he would do on talk shows, podcasts and the like. Last weekend, I was watching HBO’s new documentary about the recently departed comedian Bob Einstein, who was best known as Marty Funkhouser on Curb Your Enthusiasm.
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